MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
