So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
