What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
