i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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