i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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