put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
