Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
