I love black thongs
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
