Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
