My first STD was from a foam party
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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