there's paper in my vomit.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
