would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize