Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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