how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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