it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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