Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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