I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize