Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
