i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Randomize
