I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
