it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
