You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
