Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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