love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
