ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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