You're so nebulous sometimes
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
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