are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
