btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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