I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Nicole vs. Life
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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