Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
