we made out on top of his cat.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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