Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
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