I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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