i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize