I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
