I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
