Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
