You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
