After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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