remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Randomize
