Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
