i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
We need to get me chipped asap
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize
