You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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