I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
