She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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