when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
