On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
