i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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