youre lurking in front of me
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
