PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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