Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
